Living As A Cancer Survivor - From Tiers to Tears - Part 2
Mark Everett Kelly
Mark Everett Kelly was diagnosed with Stage IV Rhabdomyosarcoma on December 12, 1990
On November 13, I submitted Part 1 of my latest blog titled "From Tiers to Tears." The title came to me after my initial attempt at Patreon, a website which helps bloggers, video gamers, and other entrepreneurs in social media, receive financial support from those that value their output. When you sign up for Patreon, one of the suggestions to receive assistance is to give back to your donators with "tiers" of rewards.
The process of coming up with those rewards was an effort in humility. I have nothing to give anyone that supports me other than my heart and promise not to let the diseases I live become an excuse for failure. Upon realizing how little I have, I started to cry. Hopelessness overtook me in the way in which I began to doubt everything about my life. The voices that discourage and prevent me from trying started to ring louder in my head.
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I take total responsibility. I also deleted the tiers. The fact is if people are giving because they expect something like a reward, then they shouldn't donate to me. What you are giving to is a cause. I ask others, what would you do in my position? If you survived cancer, yet couldn't work anymore and support yourself or your family, what are the options? I get disability, which covers my health insurance and about 3/4 of my medical bills. I promise you $1400 a month does not go far on Long Island.
I believe from the bottom of my heart that I can still give something back to prove my worth. I am not worthless, although as the months pass and after asking for help and sharing this page with facebook and twitter and still seeing zero, I am facing a real crisis. Why am I failing? Why aren't my efforts to fight with all I have, get off my ass, and do whatever I can to prove worthy of at least trying, worth something to people who give? I don't have the answer. If I were forced to provide one, it would be that I'm just not worth it.
I know this is depressing, but I care about people like me who face the same dilemma I do. Financial issues will make you very depressed and questioned the very nature of your existence. That is the sole reason for my sadness. When you are unable to support yourself, you are indebted to others. When you have no choice in a situation that was not of your doing, it can keep you up at night.
In closing, I am asking that if you believe in my story, my perseverance, and are inspired by someone who uses everything he can physically do, it would be an honor if you joined my journey and support me. Please visit my Patreon page.
I can always be reached by email (CKMagicSports@gmail or LivingAsACancerSurvivor@gmail). Please see the links below to follow me or contact me on social sites. I welcome (need) more followers and supporters. Please don't be shy about sharing your thoughts.