Living As A Cancer Survivor - Does Character Matter Anymore - Part 1

Mark, seen here with his dog Sammy, was diagnosed with Stage IV Rhabdomyosarcoma in December 1990.

In October of 1999, I left my job doing sports radio at WCCP in Clemson, South Carolina. Although being a part of the morning show three times a week was a goal of mine, my dream job was to work at ESPN. When Norby Williamson called, who had just received a promotion from the senior coordinating producer of SportsCenter to assistant managing editor and news director of studio production, I almost fainted. Mr. Williamson placed that phone call as a favor for Dick Vitale. Dick, his wife Lorraine, and Howie Schwab are angels sent from heaven. 

Nine years earlier in October 1991, Make-A-Wish approached me at Sloan Kettering and generously granted me a wish, which turned into meeting Dick at the 1992 Final Four.

Dick's generosity was why Mr. Williamson called me. However, in my mind, I thought, "well, what took you so long, ESPN?!?!"

I thought I knew it all. I was a 25-year old whiz kid who could wow everyone with my knowledge and ability to spout off sports statistics.

ESPN brought me in for an interview, and I thought I nailed it. The score I received on the test they gave me concerning statistics, calculating numbers, and recognizing historical facts was one of the best. 

I traveled back home to Long Island expecting to hear when I needed to report for work. A week later, I still had not heard back. Dying of curiosity, I called the person who was supposed to contact me. 

The voice on the other line proceeded to tell me they hired someone else. I was devastated. 

I had no idea what to do. Keep in mind, this was before the long term side effects of radiation and chemotherapy fully surfaced. My right leg was still a regular size as Lymphedema had not set in yet, and despite suffering from IBS and Colitis, I hadn't experienced the intestinal blockages that developed into Crohn's. 

I reached out to a friend at the Associated Press who lined me up with the overnight sports editor. The position I interviewed for in New York City was to run the AP Wire during the graveyard shift. While that might sound awful to some, to me, it was heaven.  

Upon arriving home from my interview with the AP, I received a phone call from the person who passed me up at ESPN. He proceeded to offer me the job he said I wasn't good enough for the week prior. Tune in to find out what happens next week!

What does this have to do with surviving cancer? We all depend on our survival instinct to take over when we are in danger. I believe God gave me strength that kept me alive during my bone marrow transplant. I faced impossible odds that should have killed me countless times. Each day which passes, and I don't return that gift of life to others, bothers me.

If I'm not here to encourage, motivate, and inspire others to appreciate the many blessings, along with carrying the torch for those who passed away from this disease, why am I here?

I've learned countless life lessons over the last few years concerning the consequences of choices. How many of us consider how our choices affect others? Do we find the character God develops in us when we struggle?

In the last few years, God has shown me what matters in life. Living with the reminder that tomorrow is not guaranteed, causes severe anxiety about the time I have left on this earth.   

Waiting on God's timing is hard. I'm tired and sad, but I need to trust the character He has refined in me touches others' and gives them the hope I often lack myself. 

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