Most of us struggle with our understanding of why things happen. I have wondered about this since my diagnosis at age 16.
Everyone can struggle with "the grass is always greener" theory. We usually look at the lives of other people and say, "If only I had that" or "If only my life worked out that way."
I don't have an issue with others who admire certain people and aspire to greater heights in their own life. However, we only have this life. As much as we want to, wishing things would be another way will waste valuable time.
Cancer will make you understand perspective real fast. When I was sick, I valued my days more. I cherished my relationships more. When you don't know how much time you have, you want to make the most of it. I think of Holly Butcher's thoughts when she knew she was dying.
That's the thing about life; It is fragile, precious, and unpredictable, and each day is a gift, not a given right.
I'm 27 now. I don't want to go. I love my life. I am happy... I owe that to my loved ones. But the control is out of my hands.