It's been over a month since my last entry, so it's about time I started to post more consistently.
Thank God for the promise of eternal life. We will all once again be reunited with our loved ones.
I'm certainly not alone in my desire to see 2020 end ASAP. Only 1991, when I spent 10 of 12 months in the hospital receiving or recovering from cancer treatment, was more challenging to experience.
The culmination of sadness occurred on October 9. While I prepared for work, I checked on my dog of 15 years and best friend in the world. He struggled through Thursday, and I knew time was short, but it still didn't prepare me for what came next.
I held Sammy most of the previous night, wanting him to feel safe and loved. He slept beside me, but I woke early to shower and barely noticed I hadn't heard a peep from him in the last hour. When I lay down to say good morning to him, I didn't see the familiar sight of his chest going up and down. I then touched his nose, which always annoyed him, but there was no response this time. He was gone.
I let out a scream of agony. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Nothing can prepare you for your worst nightmare coming true (me holding the dead body of my best friend). I can't express how dire my emotions were seeing him lay there, motionless. I'm not ashamed to say I cried like a baby.
I never organized a plan for this. However, somehow, I made arrangements to have Sammy cremated. The next thing I knew, it was past noon, and I was alone. I could still hear him drinking his water, barking when I brought food into the living room, and fussing so I would pick him up to cuddle. However, when I went to look to fill his water bowl back up, feed him, or hug him, he was no longer there.
It is now Sunday night, and I'm just as heartbroken. I know many think I'm crazy and being silly. Those people don't get it. Animals, especially dogs, understand and accept part of you humans NEVER could.
I spent more time with Sammy than I had anyone in my life. Sammy came with me EVERYWHERE—Doctors, airplanes, basketball games, hockey games, vacations, movie theaters, and restaurants. The church I attended knew him as a member. Little kids loved him, adults always wanted him to sit next to them, and friends who visited my home loved how excited his face became upon seeing them.
His joints began to hurt him in 2011. For the last nine years of his life, he slowly lost the ability to run and then walk. These last few months, he was so brave. I often felt he kept fighting cause he didn't want me alone. He made the car ride with me down to Alabama, and now that I'm in a better place financially, I think he knew I'd be ok.
When life's sadness affected me, Sammy cheered me up. I would pick him up and hug him during stressful circumstances.
In my next blog, I will share more about how he became my best friend. However, for now, sadness and sorrow prevent me from doing so. Here is my prayer as I get ready to lay my head down to sleep.
Dear Lord,
Thank you for giving me such an excellent example of your unconditional love for us. I pray, Jesus, that Sammy is running again (his joints prevented him from running and walking the last few years of his life) and is resting in your arms tonight. Please tell him how much I love him, how much I miss him, and how I will miss holding him.
I pray he knows how much he meant to me and understands how much I drew from his example of courage and fighting over the last few months. Thank you for allowing me to love something as much as I loved him. Thank you for giving us pals.
Thank you for saving my life
AMEN
If anyone is considering bringing a dog or animal into your home, please do so. The love you receive will reward you without limits.
Here are a few of my favorite sayings about animals going to heaven.
"Heaven goes by favor. You would stay out if it went by merit, and your dog would go in."
Mark Twain
"You think dogs won't be in heaven? I tell you, they will be there long before any of us."
Robert Louis Stevenson
"If there are no dogs in heaven when I do, I want to go where they went."
Will Rogers
"Many years ago, when an adored dog died, a great friend, a Bishop, said to me, 'You must always remember, as far as the bible is concerned, God only threw the humans out of paradise."
Bruce Foyle
"God will prepare everything for our perfect happiness in heaven. And if it takes my dog being there, I believe he will"
Billy Graham
"The dog is a gentleman. I hope to go to his heaven, not man's."
Mark Twain
